Confidence has always been a “thing” for me. My confidence level can go from “nothing’s going to stop me” to “I can’t possibly do this because…” (and trust me, I can come up with about 52 reasons why I CAN’T do this thing!)
I started working on my confidence when I felt like I was at an all time low. My life felt “meh” and I just wasn’t excited for things anymore.
At the time, I had so many things going on that were basically punches to my confidence; which led me to all of those feelings. You know, those feelings of not being good enough.
At what felt like my all time low, I began working with a life coach and confidence was the biggest thing I wanted to work on. Having someone keep me accountable and tell me that whatever it is I felt like doing was absolutely okay was a life changer.
Now I’m not going to lie to you, I still work on my confidence daily. Some days it’s up…other days it’s down. I have created a routine to walk myself out of the slump when it does happen. Will I ever stay on that confidence high naturally? I’m not sure. 🤷🏼♀️
What I am sure of is that it is 100% okay if you are feeling not-so-confident about something. There’s something else there. Figure out the REAL reason you are struggling with this thing. Once you have this figured out, it will be so much easier to recognize this in the future in order to move yourself out of this slump and into the level on confidence you want!
As I sit here writing this, I’m supposed to be on my first true road ride with a group of cycling friends I’ve hung out with more times than I can count. My confidence plummeted when I woke up to get ready. I am loaded with anxiety. Why? Well I can list off 93 reasons that have been buzzing through my mind all morning.
Here’s a few of them:
I don’t like road tires (the super skinny ones)
I’m not comfortable riding in groups (there’s rules to the road and no approximately zero of them)
What if I fall back in the group? I don’t want anyone to have to slow their ride or wait for me.
What if I don’t have anyone to talk to? (I’ll direct you back to the paragraph above. I know almost all of the people on this ride and they are freaking awesome to hangout with!)
Our house is a mess. It’s my only chance to clean
I need to give one of our dogs his meds
In all honesty, I struggle to try new things. Plain and simple. New things & new groups freak me out! It takes a lot of mental work for me to step into something like this. This is what I continue to work on and will continue to work on because I hate the feeling that comes after skipping out on that thing. The feeling of regret because I know I would have been perfectly fine, I would have had fun, I would have met new friends, and I would have given myself the opportunity to grow a little & work on my confidence.
For now, I’ll plan the rest of my day. Maybe meet up with these friends “after the fact” and still enjoy my week. I’m not going to wallow in the “ugh, if only I would have…” and instead I’ll focus on adding this work to the top of my to do list.
A promise to myself (in front of you): I promise I will expand my comfort zone to include the things that bring joy to my days. I will swap out my overthinking with excitement to try something new.